Sensual, Sexual or Erotic Massage
While there may be a difference in the definitions of 'Sensual',
'Erotic', and 'Sexual', the terms Sensual Massage, Erotic
Massage and Sexual Massage basically mean the same thing. A
Sensual Massage, Erotic Massage or Sexual Massage is the use of
massage techniques for erotic ends that is widely practiced by
couples as part of lovemaking. For example, instead of draping
the subject's body with towels, a sensual or erotic massage is
usually conducted with the subject naked and undraped. Erogenous
zones of the body such as the area around the groin and intimate
parts of the body, which are normally not touched in therapeutic
massage, will be touched in ways that increase sexual arousal.
A sensual massage can have therapeutic benefits, and an erotic
massage doesn't have to lead to sex, but we'll leave those
situations for the therapy web sites.
We're more interested in giving an erotic massage to serve as
foreplay by relaxing your partner while building sexual tension,
with the end result being intense orgasms and incredible sex for
both of you. |
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Preparation
You can let your lover know that you have something special
planned or surprise them, but you need to plan ahead.
Make sure you have at least an hour or two all to yourself. Lock
the doors, unplug the house phones and turn off the cell phones.
If you regularly have friends that drop by, then put a sign on
the doors that says "Couple having sex... GO AWAY!" This
is your private time, and you don't want to be interrupted.
Before you get started, you'll need a few items besides your
hands and a body to put them on. To help you maximize your
lovers enjoyment of the evening's entertainment, make sure you
invest in massage oils and sex lotion that is safe
for internal use, baby wipes, and candles.
You'll also need clean towels and a clean sheet.
Other items you should also have include:
- Romantic CDs
- Flavored Oils, Lubes & Lotions
- Warming Massage Oils
- Massage Oil Candles
- Scented Candles and/or Incense
- A Body Massager
- A Vibrator
- Other Sex Toys
- A Blindfold
If you don't already have these items,
and you aren't comfortable with visiting an adult book store or sex
shop, or there's not one in your area, you'll find a huge selection of
massage items to choose from at
Adam & Eve,
Passions Unchained Sex Toys, or
Hustler Hollywood.
Nothing sets the mood like music, so the romantic CDs speak for
themselves.
Why so many kinds of massage oils? Because each one crates a
different sensation. Regular massage oil remains at body
temperature when rubbed into the skin. Warming massage oils heat
up as they are massaged into the skin. Massage oil candles are
already warm when they are poured on the body. If you're not
familiar with massage oil candles, they are candles that turn into
massage oil as the wax melts and they don't burn the skin like candle
wax. Since you're giving an erotic massage as opposed to a
therapeutic massage, you'll want the flavored oils, lubes and lotions as
you move from massaging your partner's body with your hands to using
your tongue, and for added pleasure during oral sex. An erotic
massage should be drawn out over the course of two hours or more, so
you'll have plenty of time to use the different oils and lotions.
You'll need enough light to see, but not be overpowering.
Candle light is very romantic, and very erotic, so you'll want a lot of
them to create the ambiance for the massage. You'll want scented
candles or incense as well as regular, non-scented candles to produce
pleasant scents and aromas throughout the room. Incense obviously
won't light the room, and using enough scented candles to light the room
and create an erotic atmosphere will probably be overpowering. Use
the incense and scented candles sparingly, and use non-scented candles
for light and ambiance.
Body massagers and vibrators also offer different sensations, and
different levels of sexual pleasure as the massage builds to more
aggressive sexual stimulation than just gentle strokes with your
fingers. Body massagers are more intense and more powerful than
vibrators, so they are used on the body and external areas of the
genitals. Vibrators can be used on the body as well, but also
inserted into the woman's vagina or used for anal stimulation for both
partners.
Other sex toys can include anything the two of you enjoy. An
erotic massage often involves masturbating your female partner
repeatedly to bring her to multiple orgasms before intercourse, and
masturbating a male partner to orgasm at least once during the massage,
then continuing the massage to sexually arouse him until he can cum a
second time. You can use vibrators, cock rings, nipple clamps and
other sex toys to increase the sexual stimulation as you massage your
lover's body.
The blindfold is optional, but scientists say that when we are deprived
of one of our senses our other senses become more heightened.
Whether this can happen in a short period of time or not, there's an
increased sense of arousal and sexual tension when your lover can't see
what you're getting ready to do next.
WARNING: Don't use a scarf or
a necktie as a blindfold. The dyes and materials in many scarves
and neckties can irritate and injure the human eye. Visit the
Bondage sections of
Adam & Eve,
Passions Unchained Sex Toys, or
Hustler Hollywood for safe, inexpensive blindfolds. |
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Sensual massage can be
therapeutic, but we're more interested in using a sensual massage as
foreplay, with the end result being incredible sex for both of you! |
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Find Everything You
Need for a Sensual Massage |
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Use enough candles so you can see and still have
a seductive setting |
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A blindfold can increase the sexual tension
during a massage |
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Getting Started
Get Your Lover Relaxed
Start by giving your lover a calming bath. Use some
scented bath oils to make their skin smell good and make it feel
smooth and sexy. Scented bath oils add a touch of luxury
to any bath and will start to make your partner feel good even
before the massage begins.
Sit or kneel next to the tub and wash your lover's body slowly.
You want to save the sexual stimulation for the massage, so
spend more time on the back, arms and legs than on the genitals,
or on the breasts if it's your wife or girlfriend receiving the
massage. You can join your partner in the tub, but don't
get too carried away before you even get out of the bathroom.
After the bath, move to the bedroom and have your partner lie
face down on the bed. Begin by lightly stroking your
partner's body with the tips of your fingers. Start with
the feet and ankles, then work your way SLOWLY up the calves to
the inside of the knee. This is a tender spot and can be
an erogenous zone for many people. If you're not sure
whether it is or not for your lover, spend a few extra seconds
there and watch their response. Soft moans usually mean they
find it sensual.
Make your way to the upper thighs, then go AROUND the buttocks
to the lower back. You'll return to the ass cheeks later, but
for now you want to limit the amount of sexual stimulation.
The lower back is the center of tension for a lot of people, so
even though this is an erotic massage, remember that the goal is
relaxation and stimulation. Increase the pressure slightly
and spend some extra time massaging your partner's lower back to
increase the relaxation part of the massage.
After a few minutes, return to the light, teasing strokes and
work your hands up and down your partner's back a few times
before moving on to the shoulders. Just like the lower back, the
shoulder muscles are a center for muscle tension, so you can
increase the pressure slightly and gently knead the muscles in
this area for a few minutes.
As your partner becomes more relaxed, lighten your touch again
and move to their arms. Too many people tend to stop at the
shoulders or upper arms, but touching your lovers hand has a
strong emotional attachment, so make sure to work your way down
to the fingertips.
Now it's time to work your way back down to the feet in the
reverse order, still using gentle touches. Repeat the process,
going from the feet to the fingertips and back until your lover
is relaxed. This may only take two or three trips up and down
their body, or it may take a half a dozen or more. Don't get in
a hurry, but don't spend so long on the relaxing stage that you
put your partner to sleep.
One option we suggest using at this point is a fingertip
massager. These are small vibrators that fit on your
finger that provide less stimulation than a body massager or
full size vibrator, which is just what you're wanting at this
point. Of course, once you move on to the more erotic
stages of the massage, the fingertip vibrator can also be used
for incredible genital stimulation. Women can use them for
added stimulation when stroking a man's cock, and men can use
them to massage the woman's g-spot!
When you sense that your partner is relaxed, you are ready to
progress to the massage.
Starting the Massage
Pour about two tablespoons of regular massage oil into the palm
of your hand and rub your hands together lightly. When the
oil is warm and evenly distributed, begin massaging your
partner's back with long, deep strokes.
Keep the strokes soft at the beginning and keep your hands in
contact with your partner at all times. Take your time with each
rhythmic stroke and proceed from long, gliding strokes to
shorter, deeper strokes. Use your body weight rather than your
arm strength for deep strokes.
Once you have developed a rhythm that pleases both of you, move
on to the shoulders and arms, back to the shoulders, and down
the back. When you get to their lower back, move your hands to
their side and move your hands up their sides to the armpit
area, then back down their sides to the lower back again and
progress to the legs and feet. The first couple of trips you
make continue to bypass the buttocks, then around the third or
fourth trip you can start to gently brush their ass cheeks as
you move up and down your partner's body. If your partner is a
female, you can also begin to brush your hands along the outside
of her breasts as you make your way up and down her sides.
So far our massage has been pretty basic, so now it's time to
introduce some sexual tension.
Getting Sexy with the Massage
Whether your partner enjoys anal sex or not, most people enjoy
having their ass massaged, so after half a dozen trips or so
from the feet to the finger tips and back, on your trip down to
the lower back you use the warming massage oil and move to the
ass cheeks and spend a little extra time rubbing and massaging
them. You want to use a nice, firm pressure as you massage
the ass cheeks, but you're not kneading bread so don't get
carried away. You can use a finger or two or your thumbs
to rub up and down between their ass cheeks and over the
sphincter, then continue the massage and work your way back down
the legs. As you rub the warming massage oil on your
lover's skin you will feel it getting warm on your hands, and
they will be stimulated from the warming sensations on their
body.
Make a few more trips up and down your partner's body, spending
more time massaging and stimulating their ass with each trip.
At this point you have a couple of options. You can have your
partner roll onto their back and continue the massage, or move
on to genital stimulation, masturbation, oral sex or intercourse
while they are still on their stomach.
If you have your partner roll onto their back, repeat the same
massage techniques as you did when they were on their back,
starting slowly and getting more sexually aggressive as the
massage continues, eventually turning your focus to sexual
stimulation of the genitals.
Genital Massage
Now it's time to use the flavored massage oils and lubes.
Apply the oil or lube to your hands and gently rub it on your
partners nipples, then trace your fingers down their stomach to
their groin and rub it gently on their and genitals. You
can spend a few extra minutes teasing his cock/her pussy, but
then use your tongue to stimulate your lover. Start with
slow, gentle licks and flicks of your tongue over the nipples
and make your way down their stomach to their groin area.
Keep the licking light and playful at first. Only you know
your lover, so it's up to you to decide when and if to start
sucking on their nipples or performing oral sex.
As you proceed with genital massage, use the vibrator and other
sex toys and use your free hand to tease the rest of your
partner's body.
Female Genital Massage
Start by gently rubbing the entire vulva, follow with clitoral
stimulation, and finish with internal and clitoral stimulation.
Don't forget the G-Spot! Remember that vaginal penetration
usually doesn't feel good unless she is already in a fairly high
state of arousal. It always helps to use a vibrator on a woman
during the massage.
Male Genital Massage
Begin by applying some lubricant to the palm of your hands and
rubbing it gently into the penis and testicles. Male genital
massage is guided by one main principle: slow down and stop or
change what you are doing just before ejaculation becomes
inevitable. Ask your partner to let you know if he is about to
ejaculate, or develop a signal – verbal cues, raising a hand,
pulling away slightly, or even subtle body language cues can all
work well. It's usually best to vary strokes at the beginning,
and then concentrate on one or two kinds of strokes as the
massage nears completion. By bringing your lover to the peak
without allowing him to ejaculate, you prolong the massage and
help your lover have a more intense orgasm.
Orgasms
Barring any medical condition, all women can have multiple
orgasms. Whether your wife or girlfriend has had multiple
orgasms in the past or not, once you begin genital stimulation
you can masturbate her repeatedly or perform oral sex on her to
bring her to one orgasm after another before moving on to sexual
intercourse. Just remember that it takes most women around
thirty minutes of direct vaginal and clitoral stimulation before
she can achieve an orgasm. Continued stimulation after she
reaches an orgasm will produce multiple, simultaneous orgasms,
but if you stop after she cums and continue with the massage, it
will take another thirty minutes or so of vaginal and clitoral
stimulation before she can achieve and orgasm again.
When most men cum, they're done for the day, but even after he
cums, you can continue the massage, and eventually get him hard
again. Each man takes a different amount of time before they can
cum a second time. Some can cum a second time in five or ten
minutes, others may take an hour or more before they can cum a
second time. Either way, by continuing the massage until he's
ready to cum a second time, he should be able to last longer
before a second ejaculation.
Mutual Massage
No one says a sexual massage has to be a one way street. The two
of you can take turns massaging one another's bodies, and either
take turns masturbating each other, masturbating each other
simultaneously, or performing simultaneous oral sex in the 69
position.
Erotic Massage Tips:
- Make sure your hands are clean and
your nails trimmed.
- Rub the massage oil on your hands
first. Massage oil directly from the bottle can be cold on a persons
body, even if it's at room temperature.
- The temperature change from
warming massage oils to using an ice cube or pouring massage oil
onto a person's skin from the bottle can create an erotic sensation
as long as your partner isn't overly sensitive to cold.
- Your hands aren't your only tools.
Make good use of your oiled arms, chest and stomach.
- Put your mouth and tongue into the
sensual massage mix. Kissing, licking and warm breath on flesh are
usually welcomed with an erotic response.
- While you use one hand to caress
her body, use the other to explore her on the inside. In particular,
find her G-spot with your finger and bring her to an
earth-shattering climax. This would be an ideal time to incorporate
the blindfold, as removing one of her senses will increase the
stimulation she'll feel from your sensual massage.
- Head to the erogenous zones.
Areas like the vagina, nipples, cock and feet are targeted because
men and women often don't know that their partner can be aroused in
other locations. The wrists, fingers, ears, the back of the neck,
and the insides of the elbows and knees probably receive little
attention. Rub, kiss, lick, and nibble on these neglected
regions. Your lover will feel appreciated, and thus aroused, by your
attention to detail.
- Don't neglect a woman's most
important arousal areas. She's accustomed to having her clit,
breasts, nipples and labia stimulated before and during sex, and if
these areas are ignored she may not become sexually aroused
- Remember to take your time and
read your lover's body language.
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Give your lover a calming bath before the
massage |
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Start with soft, gentle touches |
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Fingertip massagers provide gentle stimulation
for any kind of massage, and the 'right touch'
for erotic genital massage! |
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Avoid too much anal stimulation at first.
You want to tease just enough to slightly arouse
but still keep your lover relaxed |
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Front or Back? |
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You know your lover best, so you need to decide
whether to have your lover roll onto their back
or begin more intense anal and genital
stimulation while they're on their stomach |
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Body massagers provide intense stimulation on a
woman's pussy. Many women that have never
had an orgasm have been able to achieve one
using a body massager |
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Use your hands, vibrators, sex toys and your
mouth when you start massaging and stimulating
your lovers cock or pussy |
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Your hands aren't your only tools |
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